A deputy was summoned to probe a case of unrequited love. According to the young Juliet of the house, she’d only yester-eve dispatched a forcefully-worded electronic text-parchment to her tarnished Romeo of four years bidding him never darken her iPod again. Distraught, but strong of heart and thumb, the romantic castaway responded with no fewer than 25 tender and protracted communiqués offering his thoughts on their troubled relationship and plighting eternal troth. Irritated, his Queen of Hearts bade the officer end the wordy persecutions forthwith. Though finding nothing in the sappy prose of a threatening or dishonorable character, the deputy phoned the tragic fellow and suggested he put down his cyber-quill anon.