From the “It ain’t easy being green” files: 

Environment-loving Susie Sustainability deposited a neatly bundled stack of used newspapers at the recycling center behind local grocery. Moments later, Edie Ecology, who was looking for a neatly bundled stack of newspapers, pulled the stack from the recycling bin. Susie objected, saying the stack was for recycling only. Edie insisted, saying she was going to recycle the papers as packing material for a friend who was moving. Green hackles rose. Hard words and racially-charged accusations were exchanged. The site manager, Sammie Salvage, was summoned to defuse the situation, but instead found himself inextricably embroiled in it. Finally abandoning her ill-starred newspaper drive, Edie went into the grocery and immediately fell into a swoon. Paramedics descended, followed closely by sheriff’s deputies who tried to sort through the emotional debris.  Susie said Edie was frightening and insulting. Edie said Susie was abusive and Sammie was threatening. Sammie said he wished Edie had just asked him for some newspapers, because he had several tons of them he’d have happily unloaded on her. Nobody went away happy, but at least they all – eventually – went away.