CONIFER – After getting an unusually aggressive call-back regarding a spectacularly poor job applicant, a Main Street businessman decided to bring in an official consultant. According to his statement, the hopeful-but-hapless candidate called twice to set up interviews and immediately blew off both meetings. When he called to arrange a third strike, the businessman charitably advised him to save his gasoline as he was no longer in the running for the position. Not long after, a woman claiming to be the sad-sack’s mother, or maybe girlfriend (presumably not both) called in a huff – twice – vowing to “put them out of business” for not hiring her son/boyfriend/non-specific relation. While not particularly concerned for his commercial future, the complainant wanted an official account for his files.