PINE JUNCTION – Rushing to quash a brawl at a pizza parlor/saloon on Mount Evans Boulevard, officers arrived at about 8 p.m. to find one of the combatants sitting outside, all alone within a pungent cloud of gloom and his own alcoholic exhalations. Since the officers could wring no useful information from Suspect No. 1, they went inside to chat with an employee, who said that the unsteady fellow out front had been peacefully drinking himself happy when Suspects No. 2 and No. 3 entered at about 7 o’clock. They identified themselves by first names and claimed to be Denverites, which, by itself, is not an actionable offense. On the other hand, one of the strangers walked across the bar and, for no obvious reason, stuck a finger in No. 1’s beer and then slurped it down without so much as a “please” or “thank you.”  The fractious flatlanders then verbally badgered No. 1 until he invited them out to the parking lot to explain their discourtesies. Alas, No. 2 and No. 3 were long gone by the time deputies arrived, and a check of the area found no trace of their red pickup or bad attitudes. Since the employee helpfully volunteered to look after No. 1 for the rest of the evening, officers cleared the scene without further ado.