CONIFER – At first, the thoroughly schnockered young fellow caught snoozing in the Mountain View RTD lot at about 2 a.m. had only this to say: “My sister’s kids…punk little kids.” While ill-behaved children might easily drive a man to drink, his statement didn’t explain how he wound up inexpertly parked in the middle of nowhere, or what he planned to do next. With a little patient cajolery, the deputy learned that the man had come from Bailey, and was on his way home – to Bailey. Rather than try to reconcile that remarkably inefficient itinerary, the deputy turned his attention to the open beer on the floorboard. He asked permission to poke around the car a little bit, and the sleepy driver was down with that. When the officer turned up a quantity of sweet-smelling herb and a dainty little pipe, he was down with that, too. He was even down with a few roadside maneuvers, he just couldn’t get them down right. The deputy cited the man for underage drinking and placed him in custody. Ironically, he may have spent the rest of the night surrounded by punk kids.